Cold Stone Truth About TL…

I think the blog title of this post explains where this post is going.  Over the past week or so, my co-workers and maybe some of my friends probably thought I’ve been unsociable or not happy?  It’s not that I was or anything but more like I was doing some serious thinking about myself and the things I want to accomplish between now and when I turn 40 in three years.  There are several things I want to do between now and then but before I can accomplish them I have to figure out a major detail about myself.  It’s all good and dandy that I have plans and etc but what good are they if I fizzle out in the middle of my plan?  Like I said, over the last week I’ve been looking back at all the goals and plans I had for myself only to find a disturbing pattern to all my failed plans compared to all my successful goals and plans I’ve had.  That pattern is “accountability”.

“Accountability” is a major role when it comes to achieving goals and life plans.  Without that role, how does one keep them self motivated or continue to fight the good fight when nobody is there for you to turn to or be by your side?  This is what I have noticed about myself.  I have noticed that I start my goals or life plans out like a wildfire only see it fizzle away when I have nobody that is by my side through the process.  Without that “accountability”, there are days that that I need that motivation or the kick in the ass that a friend or workout partner can provide.  In all my successful goals or plans that I have seen through, I’ve notice that this role was present but in the unsuccessful goals or plans the role wasn’t there.  For example, in 2008 after I was diagnosed with diabetes I was able to lose roughly between 80 to 100 lbs.  The strict diet I was on along with the exercising I was doing, my mom and step-dad was there.  Most importantly my step-dad was a big influence on me when it came to exercising.  My step-dad held me accountable everyday when working.  He even joined me in our walking.  Even though his was a faster walker, knowing that he was out there with me made a huge difference in me wanting to do the walk.  Because afterward, we would talk about how that workout felt or why my time was slower or faster?  It was my step-dad that was my “accountability” and got me through the walks.  Another example, is my car IDA program that I started in September 2009 which ended in me getting my car in April 2011.  The “accountability” in this goal was both the Financial Resource Specialist and the rules of the IDA program.  I mean, would I ever been able to save $2000 for my car to be eligible for my 100% match by Brighton Center without the specialist or the goals?  Believe it or not, I wouldn’t have.  I have tried before and failed miserable.  These are just a few of my examples which aren’t very many.  Don’t have many more successful examples to give though.  So, I’m going to continue think about how I can create the right “accountability” to make my goals before 40 to be successful.

What exactly is my “Goals before 40”?  I think that will be the fancy name for my goals.  What do you all think about it?  “Goals before 40” is a plan where before I turn 40 years old, I’m going to accomplish these goals.  Everybody know that when turning 40 its all downhill in life?  If that’s the truth, then I want to have fun because the first 40 hasn’t been anything but fun for me.  So, I want to kind of re-invent myself over the next three years.  But I don’t want to fail.  My “Goals before 40” has three goals to it.

• Goal #1:
• Before or when I turn 40 years old, I want to lose 150 lbs or weigh around 200 lbs.
• That means on average for the next three years, I need to lose 50 lbs per year.  That’s very doable in my book.  It’s not a goal that isn’t unattainable.
• I’m going to need to find a workout partner.  In the past when having a workout partner, I’m very dedicated to actually working out.  I have no probably on a few days to work out alone but I tend to lose focus if its day after day.  But having somebody there I know will hold me accountable.  This is where goal #2 will come into affect.
• Goal #2:
• Before or when I turn 40 years old, I want to get my diabetes under control.
• Which losing 150 lbs will go a long way in helping out this goal.  So, what I’ll be doing to start this goal is looking at two things?
• 1)  Getting educated correctly.  Usually when diagnosed, all the newbie get educated.  I didn’t have the chance to be educated or take any classes when I was in the hospital regarding diabetes. All my education up to this point is me doing the research and filling in the blanks.
• 2)  Finding a diabetes support group.  I’m hoping this will help with the “accountability” role that I’m needing.
• Goal #3:
• Before or when I turn 4o years old, I want to have in my career job.
• First, I need to know what my career job is?  That is one thing I need to find out.  What exactly is it?  Is it staying in the non-profit field which I very much liked for the last two years.  Or is it going back to the technology field?  Is it a combo of the two fields?  Or is it culinary?  Is it photography?  What exactly is it?  Might need to figure this out first before I can start my career job.

These three goals will be a major start to my “over 40” years.  As you can also tell, these three goals basically go hand in hand.  These are very attainable goals to achieve only if I have the “accountability” role in place.  Anybody have any websites or know somebody in the Northern Kentucky area that might be a great resource or person to contact?  If so, please leave a comment here.

In other news about my life, I’ve also been thinking about other aspects of my life the last few weeks.  Here is a small quick update on things going on.

One of them is about AmeriCorps.  It’s beginning to look like I’m going to be doing a third and final year of it.  Well, I have decided that it will be my final year if I do so get a third year.  I’m kind of counting on it.  AmeriCorps would help me greatly to work on my “Goals before 40” plan.  Basically be working with low income families and homelessness along with some new responsibility.  Keep your fingers crossed.

Second thing is that my car is slowly being repaired.  When I bought the car, there were some cosmetic stuff that needed to be fixed.  So, I have gradually been fixing small things.  But this week, I’m going to have my “check engine” light and my “airbag” light fixed.  I’m hoping my car will make it to this Saturday when it goes to the dealer.  I’m having some problems with it currently due to the “check engine” light.  Apparently, my car decided to give me a code of “system to lean”.  This problem started about a few weeks after I had the car.  So, barring no major expense I’m going to have it fixed this weekend.

Well, thank you for reading my whole blog post if you are reading this.  Please leave a comment.  I’m tired of having no comments because I think people don’t want to hear me but it’s all part of the “accountability” I’m talking about.  Feel free to e-mail me if you want.  I’m always looking to meet new friends.  Again, sorry for the long post.  Enjoy your morning and/or night!

TL

Year 2011: Preview…

So, what does the year 2011 have installed for me?  As I’m sitting here in somewhat of pain from my tooth ache, the first thing I have coming up is pulling of a wisdom and one other tooth on January 21.  You know I’m looking forward for that.  NOT!!!!!!!!  Here are some things that should be coming up this year.  Of course not in any particular order.

1)  Car – last year I saved up my $2000 and this year Brighton Center should be release their part of the deal to me soon.  So, I’m kind of looking for me getting a car around the end of February or beginning of March.

2)  Possibly moving – Even though it’s not far but I’m looking to move into a two bedroom apartment here where I’m already staying.  If I can talk the landlord into the right lease and deal.  I’ll basically be moving next door where my neighbor/good friend moved out.  I’m going to talk to the landlord this week coming up.

3)  Vacation – for the first time in years, I’m looking to take a vacation.  Right now it’s scheduled for May 16 thru May 20, 2011.  In this week, sits my birthday.  Usually I just take my birthday day off but decided to do the whole week because I get a paid vacation from work.  Where I’m going is still up in the air.  Not quite sure yet or I might just stay home?

4)  AmeriCorps – My service year ends in September.  I do want to do another year of AmeriCorps but it has to be like a promotion for me.  So, if I don’t get hired somewhere, I’m planning on doing another year of AmeriCorps. I’m allowed up to four years of service.

5)  My Health – This is always on my agenda every year.  I need to start regulating my diabetes and monitoring my health better this year.  I really can’t afford these medical bills.  So, need to find a way to make myself more healthier.

6)  Visiting my mom – My mom wants me to come down soon to help her setup and transfer files from her old computer to her new computer.  That will probably be my first long trip shortly after getting the car.

7)  Computers – Maybe during this year, I can get some of my other computers back up and running.  So that I can either sell them or put them to use like I planned on using them in the first place.  Plus, I would like to create my own computer case from the plexi-glass that I’ve been saving for years.  Basically I have ideas with each of these computers I got.  For example, I want one computer to hold nothing but my music, movies, and videos files.  Another computer I want to turn into a server so that I can learn how to run a server.  I really have somewhat gotten away from this field.  I need to get back into technology.  It’s what my Master degree is in.

8)  Photography – I want to get back into photography.  This is something I have kind of gotten away from over the last few years.  But every time I hold a camera in my hand, I feel the happiness and my senses coming back to me.  So, one of my computers will be a photography editing computer.  But first I will need to save up for a Cannon Digital SLR during this year.

9)  2nd Job – Since I’m able to get a 2nd job this year, I might just do this to help with paying some of my bills, to save for that digital camera, and help fix my computers.  There is one particular job I wouldn’t mind working and that’s at a movie theatre.  So, I might apply for part time at one near by?

10)  Blog more – Something I want to do more of is blog.  I have a unique life that I can share my experiences with people.  Only if they come and leave comments and etc.  I know I might not be the best writer in the world but I have all kinds of information that it’s not funny and I want to share it.

So, if anybody wants to help me achieve any of my goals, please feel free to contact me.  I’m not always looking for money.  I’m also looking for a mentor in photography, computers, and in life.  I always wanted a mentor but never really got one.  I’m always needing guidance in something.  I’m a great person to be around and etc.

TL

2010: A Year In Review…

This was my first full year of being re-housed since I’ve been homeless.  Even though I was re-housed the last month of 2009, I was able to stay in the same place all year in 2010.  It started out rough for me as I had to get used to the idea that I had a place over my head.  But it didn’t take long before other feelings started to come back to me.  For example, the feeling of loneliness of when I came home from work every day.  But that was remedy later on in the year as I got a roommate.  Even though it’s different, have a friend to talk to is always a plus.  More about him later on in this post.  Year 2010 saw me grow as a person.  I think many of my friends would agree with me.  Even some of them think that being homeless was probably the best thing that happen to me.  Even though I understand where they are coming from, I would have to disagree.  Because I wouldn’t wish being homeless on anybody.  Being homeless is a totally different ball game.  But for me it did something though.  It kicked my determination into high gear.  Want to get motivated, become homeless?  So, what did the year 2010 have for me?  Well, let me tell you.

First, it was AmeriCorps.  Being an AmeriCorps member has did a lot.  I met more people that either are or were in a similar position like I was.  These are people that really are their selves.  No playing game or anything.  The sit down with you and they listen.  They don’t act to be your friends, they are your friends.

Just AmeriCorps alone has done more for me in 2010 than I probably could for myself.  Besides friends, I started job training.  The more I work as an AmeriCorps member, the more on the job training experience I get.  It has helped me update my resume for my job career.  Until September 15, 2010, I was a VISTA member and then switched over to LISC AmeriCorps for this last three months of 2010 where I am currently.   The switch from VISTA to LISC is actually a promotion.  It was more money but more responsibility came with the job.  Also, I’m impacting family lives in my current position.  But don’t get me wrong, as VISTA I was still impacting family lives but only behind the scenes.  For example, it was all about making a method of a program that’s already in place and make it better.  So another words, make it run smoother.  Which I did.  One of the projects took off big times and that was my housing packet.  This packet went out to over 4500 people within the community.  Now, as a LISC worker, I’m impacting family’s lives as I’m working directly with them.  I’m able to give people what they need.  It’s been amazing so for.  I can only imagine what 2011 will hold for me in this area.

Brighton Center is an amazing place.  To have this opportunity to work for them has been humbling for me.  They have helped me in many ways.  For example, they helped me pay off some of my bills so that I had no barrier to worry about when it comes to getting this place I’m currently living out.  They helped pay off my last landlord when I was unable too.  They also paid off Duke Energy bill that I had from my last place.  Plus a few other things.  But I think the biggest thing they helped me with that is immeasurable is the ability to get me to save money.  In 2010, I started my IDA account for a car.  I was able to save up $2000 in which they will match me $2000 to use to get a great car which will come in 2011.  So, budgeting was an important for me in 2010.  They actually got me to budget which I tried many times before.  But still have some problems and a long ways to go before I can say I’m successful at it.  But it’s a start.  Having great co-workers is a plus too.  It’s amazing what one can learn from co-workers at the work place.  I’m grateful for Brighton Center and hopefully I will be hired on as an employee there.

Besides for my work life, other part of my life was enhanced in some way.  My personal life has seen me go out more with friends and do more things that I normally don’t know.  Like going to events that are here in the Northern Kentucky area like wine tastings, motorcycle rally, and do more volunteering.  I was able to visit my mom for the first time in a few years.  I also adopted a family for Christmas as I bought presents for a single mom and her two kids.

Even though it seems that 2010 was all good, it wasn’t.  There were times that I had to deal with something or help a friend or two with a problem.  2010 has seen two of my friends going through a divorce.  Going thru a divorce can and is a tough thing to do.  But having a friend that is always there for them can help cushion the blow some.  One of them is my roommate right now.  He knows he has a roof over his head and a friend to talk to anytime he wants to talk.  The other friend has just started the process the last few months of the year but he will know what to do but until then, he knows he has a friend in me.  Another thing that hasn’t went good for me is my health.  My diabetes are still high but that will change soon though.

You see year 2010 wasn’t the worse or the best but it’s by far since my homelessness the best year I have had and it can only get better for me.  What does 2011 have install for me?  Got to come back when I do my “2011 Preview” post in the next few days.

TL

What Proper Diagnoses means…

Ever since I have been diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes back in April 2008, it has changed my life in drastic way.  One of those ways is understanding my body better.  Before I was diagnosed with diabetes, I used to get hot and sweaty whenever I go to sleep at night.  Whenever I would explain to doctors and friends, they would tell me it’s stress related.  Which back then could have been true.  But I always thought it might be something else because these hot flashes came every night.  But was told the same thing over and over, it’s stress related.  Things changed after I was diagnosed with diabetes.  As I study the symptoms of both low and high blood sugars, I notice that getting hot and start sweating was a symptom.  I started to notice that I wasn’t having these hot flashes or getting hot and sweaty during the night as I tried to sleep.  As the months went by, every time I get hot and sweaty or of these hot flashes I would check my blood sugar to notice that my blood sugar levels were low.  So, I would maybe drink a small glass of milk, orange juice, or apple juice and wait 15 minutes and test my blood sugar again and it would be back to normal.  Doctors want my blood sugar to be between 70 to 140.  I have been noticing when I have those hot flashes or getting hot and sweaty that my blood sugars have been below 70.

Last night was no different, when I went to bed I was fine and as I tossed and turned while I couldn’t sleep, I started to get hot and sweaty.  So, I got up and tested my blood sugars to see how low my blood sugar level was.  It was down to 65.  So, I got up and had a glass of milk and a piece of Dove Chocolate.  I waited my 15 minutes or so and rechecked my blood sugars and notice it was back up to 84 which was within my normal range.  My hotness and sweats went away.  I had a great night of sleep after that.

With me being properly diagnosed with my diabetes, I’m starting to really understand my body better as I have been putting the two things together from my past and now my present to notice the different symptoms of my diabetes.  Understanding these has helped me become a better person and more confident in life now because now I have the controls and not the other way around.

TL